Coffee and Chocolate Review Ratings: A Detailed Analysis

My goal with this brand is to authentically review coffee and chocolates from small businesses that sell online so you can get a local feel from the comfort of your home. I pay for the coffee and chocolate I review and will not accept free coffee or chocolate for those reviews, unless it is part of a normal promotion that other customers would receive as well. Basically, no special treatment. Because it does everyone a disservice if the reviews aren’t honest, including the roaster or chocolatier, because feedback is such an important aspect of both business and craftsmanship.

I wanted to do a more detailed breakdown of my ratings so that it’s easier to understand. Coffee and Chocolate ratings will be different, naturally. These ratings are designed to be complementary to official ratings like cupping score, and instead focus on the personal experience that you have with coffee and chocolate.

Coffee Review Ratings:

• Cupping Score [1-100] - A coffee tasting and scoring methodology by the Specialty Coffee Association by Q-graders. I do not touch this, just report it. Oftentimes, the scores will be aligned, but there are always surprises, and that’s what I wanted to capture.

• Aroma [1-10] - How the roasted beans smell, as well as in the cup. I look for how much I enjoy the smell when: opening the canister, brewing the cup, and taking a sip of the cup.

• A rating of 1 means this smells like a bathroom and I have lost my appetite smelling this.

• A rating of 5 means this is neither good nor bad, it just is.

• A rating of 10 means I am all but sniff the beans in my nose. I want to breath this coffee in.

• Taste [1-10] - How the cup tastes. This rating combines the flavor, sweetness, and balance of the coffee. I combine these because I think they all contribute to the flavor and experience of the coffee. This rating does heavily prioritize the taste of the coffee over the other parts.

• A rating of 1 or 0 should never be given out, this means it’s straight poison and I am probably in the hospital.

• A rating of 5 is a coffee that is neither good nor bad, it just is. It’s the type of coffee you forgot about as soon as you’ve finished. McDonalds, Starbucks, etc are just below a 5.

• A 10 is going to be immaculate. My mind cannot get over the flavor and bliss that my taste buds have just experienced.

• Value [1-10] - How good is this coffee based on the price. This combines a lot of the ratings and compares it to the price. How the coffee should be enjoyed also plays a part into this score. I break this down into dollar amounts and compare it to something else that you might be spending money on for reference.

• A rating of 1 is don’t bother.

• A rating of 5 is average.

• A rating of 10 means you won’t find a better deal.

Chocolate Review Ratings:

• Taste [1-10] - How the chocolate tastes detailing the different flavors that come into play.

• A rating of 1 or 0 should never be given out, this means it’s straight poison and I am probably in the hospital.

• A rating of 5 is a chocolate that is neither good nor bad, it just is. It’s the type of chocolate you forgot about as soon as you’ve finished.

• A rating of 10 is a chocolate that melts me in its flavor. I don’t want to eat anything else for the next day as I bask in the after taste.

• Texture [1-10] - How the chocolate feels in your mouth detailing crunch and after-texture (like after taste, but how it feels after you’ve eaten a piece.)

• A rating of 1 has the texture of gravel and I am probably worried about my teeth.

• A rating of 5 is like eating a bag of chocolate chips. It’s exactly what you would think when you picture chocolate.

• A rating of 10 means this texture is a joyful experience. It dances or melts in your mouth in ways that you verbally say “damn, that’s good” even when no one is nearby.

• Richness [1-10] - How rich the chocolate is. Do I need to stop after 1 or two pieces or can I continue to eat until I have eaten too much. 10 meaning I can eat WAY more than I should.

• A rating of 1 means this is too rich or way off balance, in an inedible way.

• A rating of 5 means it's perfectly balanced and Thanos would be happy.

• A rating of 10 means the richness perfectly matches the intention for this chocolate. Just the right amount of richness to make you shout SUBLIME in the most Kenergy way possible.

• Value [1-10] - How good this chocolate is considering all of the scores and its price. The higher the value, the more bang for your buck you are going to get in terms of quality of the chocolate, not necessarily quantity. Details will be broken out.

• A rating of 1 is don’t bother.

• A rating of 5 means this is the most average price per taste. It’s mean, median, and mode.

• A rating of 10 means you won’t find a better taste per $ deal.